[VIDEO] Duncan Nugget® #350: What You Don’t Want

Your mind cannot directly process a negative.

When told not to do something, your mind has to picture doing it first before it can process not doing it. I’ll prove it to you.

Don’t think about your favorite color.

Don’t think about relaxing on the beach on a perfect day.

Don’t think about a pink elephant with blue polka dots and green wings.

Do you see what just happened? Even if it was only for a split second, you thought about each of those things because your mind processes information using images.

Since your unconscious mind does not distinguish between reality and imagination, if you are thinking “I don’t want to fail this test” then you briefly experience failing the test. Not cool.

Work on telling yourself (and other people) what you DO want.

Million-Dollar Question:
Are you focused on what you don’t want or what you DO want?

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ACTION STEPS & DISCUSSION QUESTIONS

1. “I don’t want to fail this test” is an example of a goal that is focused on what you don’t want. Write this goal in positive terms so that it is focused on what you do want.

2. Write down 3 of your goals. Look carefully at the language you used to write them. Are you using positive or negative language? If any of your goals are written in negative terms, rewrite them in positive language that focuses on what you want.

3. What are some of the reasons and/or excuses that cause many people focus on what they don’t want? How do you or will you keep those reasons/excuses from having the same effect on you?

Duncan Nugget® #82: A Warped Sense of Reality?

Have you ever noticed that regardless of the problems or conflicts that show up in your life there is one thing that remains constant? There is one thing that is ALWAYS there.

YOU. 

A vital component of effectively dealing with conflict, challenges, and difficult people is to be able to determine what YOU contributed to the situation. After all, anybody can be somebody’s difficult person. Think about that.

I know…I know. It’s not all your fault, right? Of course not, but it is your life. A lot of times conflicts are easier to resolve and problems are easier to solve when you start by looking in the mirror. 

Accurate self-assessment is a powerful tool that keeps you from having a warped sense of reality. It helps facilitate change because when you change, things tend to change.

Million-Dollar Question:
What have you contributed to your current challenging situation?

Hispanic Youth Institute: The 2010 Hispanic Youth Symposium

The 2010 Hispanic Youth Symposium, the summer kick-off for the Hispanic Youth Institute, is now accepting applications. HYI inspires Hispanic high school students to achieve a college education, pursue a professional career, and invest in the community as volunteers and leaders.  

Hispanic Youth Institute

Mentoring

Hey! Remember…January is National Mentoring Month

Duncan Nugget® #59: From Wanting to Having

People spend a good deal of time—especially around the beginning of a new year—writing and talking about what they want. I guess that’s called goal-setting (wanting), but it’s not goal achievement (having).

What’s the difference between wanting and having?

Cash Flow in da Two-Oh-One-Oh!

My New Year’s Slogan:

Don’t you know?! It’s about that cash flow in da two-oh-one-oh!

The Difference Between Quitting and Giving Up

I recently talked to someone who had just quit her unfulfilling, dead-end job. She said to me, “Al, I am really upset. I feel bad. I have never quit on anything before.”

I felt her pain. I could feel where she was coming from. But two minutes after she said that, she was feeling a lot better.

Why? What happened? I helped to her understand the difference between quitting and giving up.

“Quitters never win.”

Garbage.

Sometimes quitters do win. Quit smoking? You win. Quit being lazy? You win. Quit blaming others for your mess? You win.

Quit a dead-end job and you will definitely win.

Some people quit because they give up. Some people quit in order to move up.

Million-Dollar Question: 
Are you giving up or moving up?